I was in disbelief!  I just could not believe what I was hearing.  Breast Cancer had never occurred in my family and I was a fit woman who had just turned 50.  I didn’t smoke, had a very healthy diet, drank some wine, and worked out on a daily basis.  I was healthy and breast cancer got me!!!

My husband Michael was also in disbelief and at this time I felt very alone and in total denial.  I now look back on this and talk about it with other women, some of whom were also in denial at the time and others who were very open about it.

I visited my surgeon Rachel who was a real sweetheart.  Michael and I sat with her and she gave me options.  One was to have a lumpectomy which would remove the cancer and alot of the surrounding tissue which would leave me with quite a large “hole”  in my breast OR I could have a mastectomy and have the entire breast removed and then have reconstruction down the road.  We decided on the mastectomy.  She said she would get it booked and give me a call in the following 2 weeks.  We went home and she called the next day for my surgery to be performed in 2 days!!  WHOA, I was in shock – kind of like a zombie.  But, I was ready to be rid of this lump!!

The surgery was over and done with really fast and I recall waking up and opening my gown.   And, actually I was NOT shocked at what I saw…I was relieved and it felt good!  My son Christopher and Michael came in and I showed them my “breastless” left chest – they both smiled with tears in their eyes.

It all began back in 2001, when one day while in the shower, I felt a small lump in my left breast. I thought nothing of it as I normally had small lumps or as I called them my “chunky boobs” at that time of the month. Well, this little sucker of a lump did not go away like the other ones did and it was somewhat hard feeling. I had been having my regular annual mammograms every October or November, so when I went to see my doctor about the lump, he said there was nothing to worry about and then he said “women are so obsessed with their breasts!!”
So, the following month which was November, I had my mammogram and I was nervous because of the lump. Two days later my doctor called me into his office to review my mammogram. Now I was a WRECK!!! He explained to me that my left breast showed an irregularity and so he wanted to followup with another mammo, but said “nothing to worry about”. I had the second mammogram in January and again I was called in to review it and it too showed “something”. So now he recommended an ultrasound which was performed in February and it showed “something”.
At that point I knew or my gut knew this was serious. A biopsy was performed which I was certainly not prepared for. All I remember about it was it sounded like a gun going off into my left breast and I was left bruised and hurting. A few days went by and then I received THAT phonecall to come in to see my doctor. “You have Breast Cancer” he said.